Sassy's Chicken Salad

Sassy was famous for her chicken salad.  Those who enjoyed it wanted to be on the list so they could receive a quart when she next cooked it up.  Her rule:  If you don't return my quart jar (glass), you are off the list.  Unfortunately, she did not leave a recipe.  If one asked her for the recipe she would give you a list of ingredients and then you were on your own.  Katy spent several days with Sassy watching her and she has the recipe down.  She,like mother, cannot tell you amounts, only the ingredients.

Today Lindsey and I tried to duplicate the recipe.  I was cooking for a friend who is off her feet for eight weeks.  The menu:  Homemade Pimento Cheese, Homemade Carrot Cake, and Sassy's Homemade Chicken Salad.  I was grating carrots at 7:00 am for the cake.  Thought it would be cute to use my six inch cake pans.  I have decided that few families can eat a regular size layer cake and besides the little cakes are just too cute.  I carefully prepared the pans, made the batter and placed them in the oven.  Quickly, I discovered I had neglected to add the four cups of carrots I had risen so early to grate.  I jerked the cakes out and added the carrots. I had to wash the cute pans, dry them and regrease and flour.   Whew!

 On to the homemade pimento cheese.  This recipe requires three kinds of cheese, so out with the food
processor.  At this time I put my chicken breasts on to cook.  I was so preoccupied with other prep that I somehow missed the smoke billowing from the oven. I had neglected to adjust  the recipe for those cute little pans and the batter overflow was burning on the oven elements.  I decided to let them cook unless I saw flames as I knew time would not allow me to bake another scratch cake.  Thankfully, the weather is temperate today so I opened the door to let in some fresh air so that  I could breathe.

All the while I am washing dishes as I go.  I just can't stand dirty things about me when I cook.  Pimento cheese is done. As both pimento cheese and chicken salad require hand mashing,  their is much hand washing going on in between.   I move on to draining and cooling the chicken.  At this point I think it safe to remove cakes to cool.  They look a little strange with the centers saggy and sad but I am thinking the homemade pineapple, cream cheese frosting will hide the damage.  Back to the chicken salad.  Chicken is cool so I set about to process it.  Ofcourse, the processor bowl had to be washed and dried from the pimento escapade.

Lindsey arrives to help and bring the celery that I forgot to pick up at the store.  Eggs are boiling.  We wash, clean and cut celery.  All the ingredients are to be processed separately or as Katy says one will end up with chicken salad pate'.  Lindsey and I are both nervous as we have never attempted Sassy's Chicken Salad.
We are at a critical point.  We have processed:  boiled eggs, chicken, pecans, celery.  I am afraid there are not enough eggs.  Lindsey says it looks fine to her.  We move on to the most critical point.  The additon of mayonaise and Durkees.  The amount of Durkees is critical and I am working on borrowed time as I have a 12:00 p.m. hair appointment.  I am certainly willing to spend a morning cooking for a friend but not at the expense of a missed hair appointment.  We add amounts, taste test and add more or not.  As I have a cold, I must depend on Lindsey to give the final decision.  She concludes it is a success and I am on my way to clean up the kitchen and make that hair appointment.

The cute little cakes were saved by the frosting.  Lindsey said frosting was yummy as she was licking the bowl, so I pray my disaster goes unnoticed.

Needless to say I was completely exhausted when I arrived at the hairdresser's salon.

Sassy's Chicken Salad

Chicken Breasts:  cooked and shredded
Boiled eggs
Celery:  Not too much
Sweet Relish:  just a plop
Pecans:  Whatever you have
Mayonaise:  A glug, glug
Durkees:  A glug

Process each ingredient separately so you don't have chicken pate' in the end.  Mix ingredients and hope for the best.

This is as was told to me.  Good luck.